Vulnerability is Strength

Vulnerability is Strength

Are you afraid of getting “real”? Terrified to let down your guard and allow people in? Do you equate vulnerability with weakness?

I was just like you only a few years ago. Now, I have discovered that vulnerability is a superpower.

In this video, learn how I overcame my fear (and my wish for you).

Coaching Isn’t Therapy (a word of warning!)

Coaching Isn’t Therapy (a word of warning!)

I saw a troubling Facebook recently. A woman claiming to be a life coach said her client is no longer suicidal after working with her for three months (no mention of a therapist or other mental health professional).

❌COACHING IS NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR THERAPY ❌

This wasn’t the first time I’ve seen a coach making potentially dangerous promises, but it was definitely the most egregious.

The truth is, any coach worth her salt will not promise or agree to help you process trauma or treat mental illness.

Coaches help clients make life changes. The process may involve some amount of reflection (to identify the triggers and limiting beliefs keeping a client stuck), however, coach’s work is largely future focused.

Only a licensed health care provider should delve deep into past wounds, provide medical advice, or engage in patient diagnosis.

Therapy takes a person from hurting to surviving.
Coaching takes them from surviving to thriving.

If a coach doesn’t explain to the difference between coaching and therapy, walk away. If you express that you are depressed or are otherwise suffering and the coach doesn’t refer you to a therapist, walk away.

Life coaches who are “treating” people with mental health issues are giving coaching a bad name. They are harming the profession and harming their clients. Period.

Please be cautious when choosing a coach. Ask them about their boundaries and how they can and cannot help. Don’t entrust your mental health to someone who isn’t actually trained to care for it.

If you have any questions about hiring a coach or when it’s better to seek therapy, hit reply and ask. I’m happy to give you feedback without a sales pitch. Book a free discovery call here.

When Times Get Hard

When Times Get Hard

Some days I’m great, other days are hard. In the past, I’d beat myself up on bad days. My inner dialogue would go something like, “You spent last week feeling great? What a joke! This is the real you—a total loser. A loser who can’t even snap yourself out of this. You’ll always be a loser, so stop trying to fight it.”

Those days are long gone. Today, that conversation goes something like, “Today may suck, but that’s okay. These feelings never last; you’ll be okay. Until then, remember I love you!”

Bad days—or weeks, months, years—happen.

It’s nonsense to pretend that we can all be happy all the time. If that’s your goal, you’re setting yourself up for a lifetime of disappointment and self-loathing.

What really matters is how we handle the bad times. You can kick yourself while you’re down, or love yourself through it.

Think about how you talk to yourself on bad days. Here’s a little permission and encouragement to give yourself some grace. Talk to yourself like you’d talk to a friend. You don’t have to be your own worst enemy.

It’s as simple as it sounds, but also incredibly difficult (it took me years to get here).

Each time you change your inner dialogue, even just a little, you rewire your brain. Slowly and surely, your unconscious, knee-jerk thoughts and feelings will begin to change. And that’s powerful.

Have a nasty inner critic who won’t shut up? Grab my Silence Your Inner Critic Workbook (click the button below) and use the exercises to reframe the mean thoughts.

You’re Allowed to Want

You’re Allowed to Want

Do you feel guilty for wanting more or less? Do you think you’re not “allowed” to ask for what you want and need? In this episode, get a pep talk about why it’s okay to want, especially as a woman.

In this video, I talk about why I think women need to call BS on the idea they can’t want for more (or less).

If you find this pep talk inspiring, please share it with others!

Need help learning how to more confidently ask for what you want and need?

Sign up below to join my free Gutsy Ask Challenge.

For 10 days, get emails with practical tips for making gutsy asks. You’ll also get access to an incredibly supportive Facebook group with other participants. They’ll cheer you on and inspire you to ask for more.

Best Journals to Buy

Best Journals to Buy

Do you love journaling as much as I do? It’s an exercise I ask all of my mindset coaching clients to use because I know how powerful it can be in helping you dig deep and make big changes.

In this post, I want to share some of the best journals to buy to help you achieve your goals. These are all paper journals made for women by women. There are a bunch of options because you need to find what works best for you. There is no one-size-fits-all solution, so look at the pictures and maybe even try a few out to find the one that best suits your needs.

Want to know more about how journaling can help you find success, or how to do it well? Check out The Ultimate Guide to Journaling for Small Business Owners for all of that and more.

If you prefer to use your daily planner as a spot for journaling, don’t miss my roundup of the best 2020 planners made for women business owners by creative women!

(This post contains affiliate links. If you purchase via a link here, I may receive a commission. The price is the same for you whether you use my link or buy directly from the vendor.)

Daily Peace Journal by Ashley Shelly

The Daily Peace Journal from Shelly Planner ($10) is a 5×8 paper journal that includes 3 months of journaling spaces. Each daily entry space has an area to clear your mind/brain dump, a “Top 3” list to write down your daily focus, an area to record what you are thankful for, and finally, a space to write your favorite memory of the day. This journal is easy-to-use and is designed to reduce the noise in your brain. It’s perfect for people who want a simple set of prompts to use each day rather than having lots of blank space staring at them.

Learn more/order: AshleyShelly.com

 

Hardcover Journal from InkWELL Press

The Hardcover Journal ($19) is perfect for bullet journaling, taking notes, or brainstorming ideas. The paper is thick so pens write smoothly with no bleed through, and the book lies flat. There are four color-coded sections so you can use this to organize ideas for four different subjects or for each quarter of the year. It has full-color grid lines (a different color for each section) to help with bullet journaling. Speaking of, your purchase includes access to free bullet journal downloads to help you customize the journal even more (prayer journal, pregnancy journal, goal setting journal, etc.)..

Learn more/order: InkWELLPress.com

Ponderlily Travel Journal

The Ponderlily Travel Journal (£18 GBP) includes a world map so you can record places you’ve been to and want to explore, a Wanderlist to note people to meet and things to try, and space for keepsakes and memories. Use the 80-page journal to plan your next dream vacation, plan your stay more mindfully, experience purposeful living as you explore the world, and celebrate every step of the way. And it has a beautiful vegan leather cover, eco-friendly recycled paper, and vegetable-based inks, so it’s perfect for anyone who is concerned about the environment. This is a UK-based company, so it’s a great option for folks who don’t want to pay hefty shipping for U.S. products. 

Learn more/order: Ponderlily.com

The Commit 30 Fitness Journal

The Commit 30 Fitness Journal ($29.99) is a compact journal that will help you focus on movement, nutrition, mindfulness, and motivation—one day at a time. Set up in a similar fashion to a planner (but this is undated), it includes monthly calendars, weekly layouts, 30-day challenges, meal planning sections, exercise tracking, and more. With customizable rows to track anything from steps or miles, to carbs or weight, this is the tool you’ve been waiting for to help you reach your fitness and wellness goals. 

Learn more/order: Commit30.com

Dailygreatness Notebook

The Dailygreatness Notebook ($19.95) is a blank, hardcover notebook that includes 130 pages of wood-free paper perfect and a lie-flat design. It provides unlimited space to facilitate personal growth through free writing, journaling, mind mapping or brain dumps. There are three different cover designs. This is a great option for anyone who likes having nothing but blank space so they can fill the pages in whatever way they want (writing, art, mementoes, etc.).

Learn more/order: Dailygreatness.com

Write The Word Journal

The Write the Word Journal ($24) you right into the Bible without the fluff. You write out the pre-selected scripture and feel your faith grow—no perfection required! This journal for Christians will have you giving thanks, singing with joy, and dancing because you’ll be digging into what the Bible says about worship.It includes 66 unique verses over 143 pages (undated, so you can use this journal on your own schedule!). There’s also a special space to choose a Word for the Day. It’s a small, portable size (5.5×8.5 inches), has a vegan leather cover, and includes a satin bookmark to hold your place.

Learn more/order: CultivateWhatMatters.com

Inspired to Create Journal

The Inspired to Create Journal ($15) is a fun place to write down thoughts, plans, or anything your heart desires. My favorite feature is that you can choose lined pages for writing, dot-grid for bullet journaling, or blank pages for sketching. This is a larger journal (8.5×11 inches) for people who like having more space and includes 160 pages, so you won’t need to buy a replacement for a while. 

Learn more/order: 1LovePaper.com

There you have it! My roundup of the best journals to buy. I hope you find one you love! If you found this post useful, please share it with your friends and on social media. Help me spread the love for these amazing women who are making beautiful products to help all of us get things out of our brains and onto paper.

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